Behind the scenes at LWN: the weekly story meeting

Ed: Okay, story ideas for week two. Let's go around the table. Lorna? Got any Entertainment news for us?

Lorna: Dave Matthews is dumping crap on Boston and Chicago.

Ed: Good. Arthur?

Arthur: Cat hunting in Wisconsin.

Ed: Excellent. Maria?

Maria: Tiger Woods and the integrity of the universe.

Ed: Muy Bueno. Bruce?

Bruce: Chimp attack.

Ed: Sorry?

Bruce: I thought I'd start with a Planet of the Apes reference, and then segue into King Kong.

Ed: Bruce, we talked about this last week. We're not running your chimp story.

Bruce: That's what you said but just listen to this headline: "Wife: Victim tried to reason with chimps during attack" -- it's a story that begs to be ripped.

Ed: Bruce--

Bruce: The guy tried...to reason...with chimps!

Maria: Actually, I believe he was trying to distract them so they wouldn't attack his wife. It was a heroic act.

Ed: Right. We don't tear down heroes.

Bruce: But...Dave Matthews? Tiger Woods? Hello?

Ed: Entertainers aren't heroes.

Arthur: Except for Bono.

Ed: Well, sure, there's always Bono.

Arthur: And Sting. Don't forget Sting.

Ed: Okay, maybe.

Arthur: And Wil Wheaton. Did you see him on that CSI episode? Wil Wheaton rocks!

Bruce: Can we get back to my chimp story?

Ed: No.